From a Bartender's Perspective

Man I have to let all the good people know what I have to deal with every night at work.  I guess some people just don't know how to act when they go out.  Its either they don't know better or just plain are ignorant.  I have to tell you though sometimes these incidences can be too funny to get angry about.  I mean I wonder to myself, where the hell do they get this stuff from.  I've compiled some things that I hear from customers and I'll let you guys know what bartenders are probably thinking....If you are one of these people, I hope that you will take in consideration what the bartender might be thinking and maybe what altercations you will be facing ahead of you or how weak your drink might be...

"Let me get a strong island...."

 Bartender:  This person is too cheap and such an idiot because everyone knows that a long island has damn near every alcohol in it.  Your gonna get a lot more triple sec (cheap orange flavored liqueur)  and sweet and sour.

"Not too much ice...."

Bartender: Like I said earlier hella cheap.  Ice is an important part of the drink.  You pay for a standard shot in the drink, me giving you less ice means more juice.  You pay per shot, you telling me less ice doesn't mean I will give you more alcohol.

"Let me get that in a tall glass..."

Bartender:  You think I'm gonna give you more alcohol because you asked for a tall glass....no!  Like I said you pay per shot.  If you want more alcohol pay for a double.  

"I can't taste the alcohol..."

Bartender: Its probably cause you didn't tip for shit earlier, you asked for less ice, you asked for a tall glass or finally, you are a damn alcoholic!

"Hey, hey, hey!"

Bartender: First and foremost, I the bartender can see you and will get to you when I can.  Yelling at me won't make me go faster but probably ignore you.  You probably won't even know what you want when I get to you anyway!

"Why did you skip me...."

Bartender:  After yelling at me and flagging me down to ask you what you want, you said, "uuhh, uhhh," you should have had your order ready.  Time is money and waiting on you to make up your mind is loosing me money!

Here are just a few and trust me I have more but until next time.  If you fall into one of these scenarios then please reread and take into consideration before going into the bar.  Thanks